We all know that moms have so many things on their plate… there are so many things we need to juggle between caring for the kids, being a wife, completing household tasks, and working. Here are some things that help me to be a better mom and wife.
Being a better mom and wife are things I am constantly working on. I think self-improvement is a lifelong journey and I am always looking for ways to better myself.
I by no means think I am perfect or think I have figured it out, but these tips have helped me along my journey. Many of them are things I am continually working on improving.
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- Take Time For Self Care.
- When caring for others, it’s important to remember to take time for yourself. Sometimes we just need to step away from our normal duties and tasks and take a breather!
- Here are some great ideas to help with this:
- Exercise- here are some great ways to find time to exercise as a busy mom.
- Relaxation- Here are some great ways to decrease stress and ways to decrease mom guilt.
- Eating healthy.
- Find time to be by yourself. This might mean you need to go for a drive, have someone take your kids out of the house, or even go sit in a quiet area of your house by yourself. This doesn’t have to be a significant amount of time, but even a 5-10 minute break can help.
- Get outside! There is something about outside that is good for the soul.
- Spend time with friends. We all need a reliable support system. And sometimes we just need someone to vent to!
- Read a book. I like to read this great devotional book every day. Even if it’s a busy day, I can usually find a couple of minutes to read one devotion. This really helps set the tone for the day and helps improve my outlook for the day.
- Here are two great resources that can help you with self care.
2. Set Clear Expectations.
- Establishing expectations for yourself, spouse, and your children can help to decrease stress and can help to make sure you have time to get everything done you need to.
- Along with setting clear expectations, I like to make sure we have a schedule and structure. This can help me make sure the house stays clean and we get to where we need to be.
- Try to allocate tasks that you can. Have your husband and children help with household tasks, utilize grocery pick up, have a cleaning service come to your house, use a robotic vacuum, etc. Anything to help you save time! Check out this great post for other time-saving tips for moms.
3. Practice Patience.
- Patience is key in any relationship, especially when it comes to raising children.
- I know this is sometimes easier said than done. It’s something I am constantly working on myself.
4. Take your time and be consistent with discipline and love.
- All relationships take time and love. It’s like a garden… you need to feed and water your relationships in order for them to thrive.
- Be consistent with your discipline and don’t make empty threats.
5. Lead By Example.
- Show your children how to be respectful, responsible, and kind. Model the behavior you want to see in your children.
- This is another thing I am constantly working on. I think this is an area of self-improvement that most of us can work on.
- Check out this Medium post I wrote on how focusing on character traits is helping me to be a better person.
6. Maintain Open Communication.
- This is something I can’t stress enough! It’s so important to talk to your children and your spouse, but it can be so hard at times.
- Talk to your children and listen to their perspectives and feelings. Being open with your children and spouse creates a safe space for communication and trust.
7. Be Flexible.
- I am a planner. I love to plan and organize every detail of my life. If there is one thing being a mom has taught me, it’s that I need to be more flexible and be better at rolling with the punches.
- This is something I struggle with and I am constantly working on getting better at this.
- Just when I think I have everything planned and ready to go, something happens or someone gets sick. I’m working on embracing the chaos.
- Children have a lot of energy and changing plans is inevitable. Instead of getting frustrated, embrace the change and be flexible.
- Don’t get me wrong, I think planning is important and necessary, but it’s also necessary to be flexible when needed as well.
8. Celebrate Accomplishments.
- We need to celebrate big and small accomplishments.
- Celebrating accomplishments can help motivate kids to continue to work hard and can help boost their confidence.
- It also shows our kids (and our spouse) that we care about them and we are in this together. It helps to foster good relationships and it just helps everyone to feel better about themselves.
- Plus is fun for me as a mom to celebrate success and accomplishments!
- Life is hard enough the way it is. Celebrating accomplishments gives us something to look forward to and some positivity in our lives.
9. Nurture Connections.
- Quality family time is essential for children’s development. Heck, it’s essential for all relationships!
- It’s important to spend time together as a family and make sure to stay connected with extended family as well.
- Not only is it important for the relationships in your life, but it also sets a great example for your kids. It helps them to learn about healthy relationships and this is an important lifelong skill.
- Not only is family time important, but is it also important to spend time with each child one on one. We try to spend one on one time with each of our kids at least once a week. Sometimes it’s something as simple as reading a book or sitting in their room and talking about their day.
- I wrote this article on Medium about why I am focusing on spending more one on one time with my kids.
- Try to find new fun things to do as a family.
- This doesn’t always have to involve spending money as well. Play a new game, find a new park to go to, go to a different beach, play outside, make a fort, etc. Here are some great indoor activities to do with your kids.
10. Prioritize your tasks and stay organized.
- Take a few moments each day to analyze your to-do list, and decide which tasks need your attention first.
- Prioritizing your tasks can help you to focus on what is important and help decrease stress. It helps you to have a plan to get the things done you need but also gallows you to spend time with your family as well.
- Plus, I feel better when I am crossing stuff off my to-do list. I think the trick with this is you have to make your to-do list manageable.
- I like to set goals and a plan to accomplish each goal. I like to do this in all aspects of my life… work, house cleaning, relationships, etc.
- I can’t tell you enough how important it is to stay organized and how much that can help decrease your stress.
11. Focus on the present moment.
- This can help you to increase your productivity and be more present for your family.
- This really goes hand in hand with prioritizing your tasks. Prioritize and then focus on each task at that moment. That helps you accomplish what you need to get done and you can ultimately have more time with your family.
- How often do you get sucked into scrolling on social media?! Put your phone away and focus on the present moment… whether that be getting the work done that you need or spending time with your family.
- I like to schedule important tasks during my day. This way I can make sure I get things done, but it also helps me to focus on my children. Until I started scheduling important tasks, I found myself constantly checking emails and working on things. I noticed I was not present with my children when they were around. I’ve been working on getting rid of distractions when my children are around. This is easier said than done!
12. Stay positive and practice gratitude.
- There are so many benefits to practicing gratitude.
- Not only does practicing gratitude help you, but it also sets a great example for our children.
- My parents never really modeled gratitude and this was a hard thing for me to learn in adulthood.
13. Don’t compare yourself to others.
- It just makes you feel bad and it doesn’t help anyone. It doesn’t help you to be a better mom or wife to compare yourself to others.
- Remember that everyone is at a different point in their life and everyone has different experiences.
- I think it’s great to reach out to friends and other people you respect in your life for advice, but don’t compare yourself to them!
- Let go of perfection! You will never be perfect and your life will never be “perfect”. I like to think that is the beauty of life and that is how we grow. Once you can realize this, your life will be much less stressful.
Being a wife and mother is a lifelong journey. We are constantly changing, learning, and growing. I hope these tips can help you to be a better mom and wife.
I am always looking for how to improve myself and to be a better mom and wife. Do you have other great tips? I would love to hear them!
